Have you ever shouted at something random

... and that's how you finished the crime thriller

...

"How .. four? You don't think that at my age I will still put myself in danger." throws in Rosmarie Keller. "Well, nobody is asking for that, and I didn't mean to say that you, Frau Keller, should get into some daring fistfight." says Gaillard. "No, I meant rather that you could still alert the police while I try to see something through the window from the garden. Odermatt may be able to locate Alder's phone number with his technical skills in the meantime. Or does one of you already have one? No ? Ok. And Hefti, with his stature, stays here in front of the door and holds any refugee until the police arrive. " "Mooooment", says Hefti at once. "I'm supposed to stand at the front here while you all duck back, outside or up?" "Well, I'm not afraid and I'm not a sad child either. But what if this guy has a knife or even a gun?" "Hey my dear ones," says Odermatt. "I feel flattered how you rate my options regarding phone snooping and I also generally believe that the four of us shouldn't just stand around idly and just discuss. But has anyone of you actually rang the doorbell at Alder's door? Or at the door knocked? " Everyone looks at each other and ultimately the eyes fall on Rosmarie Keller, because she was the first at the door. "I?" whispers Keller. "I would never make myself noticeable in such a situation. Who knows what could happen?" "But now there are four of us," said Gaillard again. "So let's ring the doorbell and knock on the apartment door. Okay?" Everyone nods their head, Hefti very determined, Keller a little hesitant and Odermatt also points his thumb up, as a starting signal, so to speak. "And who of us should ring the bell and knock on the door now?" Rosmarie Keller asks everyone. Everyone looks at each other again until finally the eyes fall on Hefti. "It's okay, it's okay, okay. But you guys stay close to me." Hefti accepts the democratic decision. So he stands in front of the door and the others behind him, as if in single file, first Odermatt, then Gaillard and at the back, very crouched, Rosmarie Keller. Hefti rings the doorbell ... a second time ... and then resolutely knocks on the door. Silent waiting. Then all of a sudden the door opens. A tall, strong man stands there and wordlessly looks at the assembled tenants. "We would have liked to speak to Ms. Alder for a moment," says Odermatt from the second row. The man doesn't say anything again, time seems to stand still ... Luna Alder comes from the background. She has a smile on her face, pushes past the big man through the door ... and hugs Hefti. "Are you all right, Ms. Alder?" pushes it out of the back of Frau Keller. "Yes, it's all right, more than that," replies Luna Alder. "Ms. Keller, Mr. Gaillard, Mr. Hefti, Mr. Odermatt. May I introduce you to my brother, Luca Alder." Good evening, "he says." Good evening, "stammered the tenants, who were still excited," I invited Luca to lunch today . He was in Germany on business the whole last week and actually wanted to drive back to Bologna in the course of the afternoon, where he has been living for 10 years now. But since we haven't seen each other for a long time, we had a lot to chat with, so that the time flew by. So we sat together comfortably until the clock hands were at 8 o'clock. And Sunday, 8 p.m., is crime scene time. Since Luca never missed a crime scene before he moved to Italy, he was looking forward to it too. So we sat down in front of the TV with a glass of good red wine. Today's episode was very mysterious and depressing and many camera angles were gray. And especially in the one scene where the young woman was in her 2-room apartment late in the evening and in her state of fear believed she was in danger and needed help ... but no one in the whole house responded to her ringing ... at the latest I asked myself whether something like this would also be possible here in our house. We know each other by name, but no one knows much more about the other. What if one of us needs help? With this queasy uncertainty in our stomach and considering that my brother and I had honestly already drunk one or the other glass, we made the decision together to put it to the test. Sunday evening, everyone is sitting in front of the television, watching the crime scene mesmerized .... What happens when there is a fire ... when someone is in acute need .... So we started our production, at first with a rather low scream from me. Then it was my brother's turn with his powerful, deep voice. It might suffer a little more noise, I thought, and knocked over a chair. And then let out another scream and whimpered afterwards. Then it was up to my brother again, this time louder and more violent in his words. And finally I called for help ..... We waited anxiously to see if there would be a reaction. And sure enough, the doorbell rang. But it wasn't the doorbell, but the one at the front door, which has a different sound. Then silence again. And finally, about 5 minutes later, the doorbell rang and knocked right on my front door. Dear neighbors, please excuse all the excitement, your fears and worries, the agonizing uncertainty. And I would like to thank you very much for your reaction this evening. I feel relieved and am glad not to live in this house alone. "Well, it took a few seconds for the four of them to recover from this shock. But soon everyone fell into each other's arms and bumped into one another Glass of wine to the new-found neighborhood. PS: From this day on, the weekly stairwell cleaning was taken over by every tenant in rotation.

...
«Shall we sound? Hefti, ring the bell! " Hefti rings the bell. Frau Keller leans against the door. Suddenly the door opens. Frau Keller is frightened and falls to the floor. Hefi helps her up again. Frau Keller thanks you. Hefiti asks Ms. Keller: "What happened?" Ms. Keller replies: "The door suddenly opened." Now all four go into the apartment and see what's going on with Mrs. Alder. You see Mrs. Alder standing in the kitchen, frightened. Hefti asks her: "What happened?" Ms. Alder replies: “I was on the phone and then my phone melted. I threw my mother's valuable vase off the table in shock. " Everyone is very relieved that nothing worse has happened. Ms. Keller still has a fine chocolate cake in the apartment, which she fetches and everyone enjoys it together at Ms. Alder's apartment.
Pauline Elsenbast and Steffi Achenbach

...
Hefti takes over the direction. "We're all banging on the door and you, Frau Keller, go outside and look through the window." Hefti sends Odermatt to the cell phone to call the police. Ms. Keller comes back breathless and says: “Outside you can see Wegmüller's car; You can't see anything through the window, the shutters are down. " Suddenly you can hear the male voice from Alder's apartment shouting "Quiet" and continuing to "clean your own door!" Odermatt comes back with his cell phone and says that the police won't be there immediately, it's full moon today and everyone is crazy, and a storm is announced ... ”Hefti presses the door latch violently and almost falls with the door into the apartment. The other three push behind and so all four are in the apartment. But everything is quiet there, and no television is on either. The Alder and the Wegmüller stand tightly embraced and look perplexed at the intruders. The apartment is very neat and tidy. Alder is the first to ask the dead silence of the moment: “What is this about, what are you doing here? Frau Keller stammered: "We heard cries for help and noise and thought you needed help!" Alder and Wegmüller look at each other and begin to laugh until they cry and say: "We're rehearsing a crime thriller!" She goes into the kitchen and gets six glasses and a bottle of wine. Odermatt disappears and comes back with pizza. Everyone toasts good neighborhood help.
Christine Zaccharia, Barbara Häusermann and Liselotte Reinmann

...
You report it to the police. Mr. Gaillard invites everyone for a drink, because they do not want to interfere in the private affairs of the screaming people.
Margherita Doiot

...
«You have to help and do it immediately. Speed ​​is of the essence. Otherwise it will be too late ». Mr. Gaillard takes off his wooden zoccholi and holds it up like a weapon. Frau Keller also used her scrubber. Heft bravely pushes the door handle down and lo and behold: it's open. What they see takes their breath away. Before your eyes two people in ancient costumes, the apartment decorated as in the 18th century. Mrs. Alder is hardly recognizable with her make-up. Everyone is speechless. Ms. Keller puts her mop on the floor and is the first to find her voice again: "What's going on here?" What kind of noise is that? " Her voice sounds a little higher than usual. "We are only rehearsing for the next crime play," The alleged death under the pew, "" explains Ms. Alder, somewhat astonished.

...
Herr Hefti went into the cellar with Hernn Gaillard to get a ladder. They found one numb in the corner and climbed with her onto Frau Alder's balcony. What is there? A huge mess in the apartment. Together with a black person. It creaked and some of the things fell to one side. The two hobby detectives knocked on the window. Ms. Alder was a little irritated by the neighborly surveillance, but she opened the door in a friendly manner: "What's going on, can we help you?" Asks Mr. Gaillard. “Are you threatened?” Adds Mr. Hefti, building up threateningly. "Everything's fine," replied Mrs. Alder. Me and Mohammed, my daughter's friend, are cleaning up here ». "But why is everything so mixed up here," asks Mr Gaillard. “Well, it's about sorting out old things that are tainted with unnecessary thoughts from the past. And if something is particularly oppressive, you can jump on it and there is a thud. Finished. Mohammed, do you want to demonstrate that? " "We were very disturbed from the outside," said the two gentlemen and half the house is in front of the door, "says Ms. Keller. "No problem," says Ms. Alder. "Come on, in the end we will pour a good Burgundy on top of the old thing that we dispose of together." All in all it was a bit strange party, but the Burgundy, born in 2005, liked everyone and the apartment seemed freer and bigger.
W. Elsenbast

...
“Sure,” says Hefti, “let's break the door down”. "Stop stop". Gaillard explains that first the word has to have its say. And that's why he rings the bell for a long time. Multiple times. No reaction. But there is dead silence. - Ms. Keller has a queasy feeling. "Are they dead now?" Hard enough. He rumbles violently on the door and yells: “Open! Open the door immediately, otherwise I'll do it! ». Then the door opens a crack. Luna Alder, completely disheveled and with big eyes, asks: "YES, what's going on?" "You called for help several times," says Hefti impatiently. "Yes that's true. Our snake got away. We didn't agree on what to do now. We went on the hunt, which then fell victim to some furniture. And finally we caught our rascal with the fangs together and everything is fine ». The neighbors are relieved to have a nightcup with Ms. Keller.
Malon Durrer, Renate Kohler

...
Herr Hefti did not hesitate long. He rings the doorbell and when nothing happened, he stormed into the apartment. Everyone else was happy that Hefti had taken the initiative and decided for her. There was dead silence in the apartment. When the stairwell troop came into the living room, Luna Alder and her theater partner Mohandas Glauser were sitting on the sofa and looking at them with big eyes. They did not know what was happening here, they practiced the piece "The exciting new beginning" with background noise. Epilogue The company would have liked to know that Ms. Alder is in the theater. Over the schnapps in the living room everyone decided to advertise it and support them. Of course, everyone went to the premiere together.
Christine Ruchti, Patrick Locher

...
Hefti acts. With one kick he pushes the door in and storms into the apartment - too late! Mrs. Alder lies lifeless on the floor; next to her lies the perpetrator who rammed the knife into his heart after the murder. The roommates present are shocked, but for the first time they feel like a community.
Andrea and Markus Brüllhardt

...
Ms. Keller collects her heart and the best. Hesitantly, she grabs the latch and opens the door a crack. Everything is calm inside. Nothing stirs. «Allez-y!» says Monsieur Gaillard. All of you timidly follow her into the apartment. Candles are burning everywhere. Confused, they exchange looks. What's going on here? The television flickers bluish. Everyone looks at each other in amazement and looks at the abandoned table with the remains of dinner. Mr. Gaillard looks at Mrs. Keller with a smile and whispers: "Amour?"
Anni Strübin, Elisabeth Burger, Sonja Gerber

...
It will be discussed back and forth for a while. Everybody has a different opinion. Suddenly you hear a terrible noise from the apartment and a can. Did someone shoot there? Another bang can be heard. We ghosts all stand pale as chalk at the door. Mr. Hefti gives himself a jerk and carefully rings the bell. As if struck by lightning, he flinches and opens his eyes wide. "Shit, the bell is defective and has electricity," he lisps softly. A loud scream can be heard from the apartment, which goes through everyone's marrow and bone. We then decide to open the door and see if everything is going well. At the same moment the door opens and a cat comes flying towards us. We stand there in shock. The lady in the apartment looks at everyone in surprise and asks: "What is this meeting in front of my door?" I say: "We thought something bad had happened to him". "What! I look at the crime scene and fell asleep totally overtired. Suddenly my cat jumps on me and I wake up with a scream. " The end credits of the crime thriller can be heard from the living room. Everyone goes back to their apartment calmly.

...
The door opens. Luna comes out, her face contorted with pain. Gaillard storms into the apartment with his pistol drawn. Where did he get the gun from? Luna Alder points to the foot and groans. “What happened, I shout out loud. "Say something like that!" Alder stutters: "The Bu, the Bud, the Buddha". Has she lost her mind? Hefti and Odermatt, who went into the apartment with me. Come back grinning. They point to a large Buddha statue that has broken through the glass table in the entrance. "Here is the culprit!" Luna Alder tells in pain that she wanted to adjust the Buddha a little, and he fell on her foot in the process. Hefti offers to take her to the hospital on a motorcycle. I'll see where Gaillard is. He's standing in the corner and seems a little ashamed because he accepted the worst. It takes a load off my mind. I spontaneously invite everyone to my apartment. It will be cozy. I take out the egg liqueur, Odermatt brings beer and later Hefti and Luna Alder join in too. Your foot is thickly bandaged. In the late evening we decide to found a flat share and live together in the two ground floor apartments. This also protects the stairwell.
Sabina Mäder, Christine and Manfred Ruch

...
Unexpectedly, Mr. Wegmüller opens the door. "Don't panic, call an ambulance." He explains his presence as follows: “I walk past the house as if by chance and would like to take this opportunity to see whether Ms. Keller really cleans as cleanly as she always claims. But everything is dirty. Maybe she hasn't started cleaning yet. I meet Mrs. Alder on the ground floor. Who takes two pairs of shoes out of her shoe box. Desperately she asks me: ‘AH, Mr. Wegmüller. It's good that at least you're here. Once again I bought the most beautiful high heels of my life, with the highest and pointiest heels I have ever found. You have to tell me which pair I should wear in the exit this evening! ’- So I enter her apartment, where she shows off the first pair of high heels on shaky feet. In doing so, it leaves the ugliest scratches on the new parquet. I call: ‘Stop immediately.Stop! ”Mrs. Alder exclaims euphorically:“ No, three more steps, one more turn, look how elegant! ”I yell:“ Stop immediately or I'll call the police! ”Mrs. Alder is already lying flat on the top ruined parquet, with twisted, broken ankle and whimpers pitifully in pain. And now I was just about to get help. " To the Oekumene Bern Nord: The project will be successful if it is "approached" with good shoes. Non-slip and stable, they guarantee stability, cause no pain if someone steps on someone's feet and only cause the necessary noises instead of hollow rattles. Nevertheless, such shoes can look elegant and attractive and lead safely to your destination over bumpy paths.

...
Hefti knocks hard on the door. Silence. He knocks harder. Nothing. I am impressed with how the Hefti gets down to business. Odermatt says: “Hefti, smash the door!” I say: “Or shouldn't we call the police?” A whimper can be heard behind the door and fingernails scratched on the door. Hefti makes a run to push the door in. “Be careful,” says Gaillard, “there is someone lying behind the door.” We hear a window clatter. Odermatt says: “Somebody's running away!” And runs out to the front door. I wonder if I should call Wegmüller, he must have a spare key. From inside we hear the Odermatt calling for Luna. "What?" - who uses you?
Marianne, Kathi, Magdalena, Maria, Christoph

...
They ring the doorbell and ask if there is any help. It gets quiet in the apartment, but nobody opens it. The four in front of the door continue to advise and now they knock hard on the apartment door. The door barely opens, a strange man opens it and is amazed at the number of worried residents in front of Frau Alder's apartment. In the apartment, Mrs. Alder is sitting on the armchair, her head in her hands, visibly stressed. The stranger is friendly and explains that the difficult discussion about the austerity issues of a community has gotten totally out of hand. In order to reach an agreement, they try to reach an agreement and clarification during a conversation. Mrs. Alder serves coffee and cake to relieve stress!

...
Without hesitation he pressed the bell vigorously while I - trembling with fear - stumbled backwards into my apartment. 117 or 118? What is the police number? Should I close the door? Turn the key? But then I wouldn't see what happened! Nothing happens over there! But! Now Hefti takes a run-up and it crashes. Is that strong! The door gives way and Hefti storms into the apartment like a cop. Silence! “Jeus!” I then hear him scream, “what damn… is going on here?” “Human child, what are you doing there?” I hear the strange voice asking. “We're just rehearsing our new play, I told you about it!

...
The noise, the scream, no doubt, it was real. Everyone heard it. But now it's quiet in there, dead quiet. Everyone prick up their ears, but nothing can be heard anymore. Two or three minutes, no more sound. We were probably wrong, everything was just imagination. Yes, of course we were wrong. Mrs. Alder is already asleep and we don't want to wake her. How can you be mistaken! Everyone goes back to their apartment calmly. I'll take Bello for a walk myself. In the street I turn around and take a look at Ms. Alder's apartment on the ground floor. As expected, everything is dark. But why is the window wide open? I wonder why? Funny. Yes nu!
Ruedi Eggimann

...
Hefti grins back. Before my teeth stop chattering, he takes a step forward and grabs the door handle. With his height he fills the door frame, he slowly opens the door and enters. Messrs. Odermatt and Gaillard follow. With his age and arthritis, I wonder if it's reasonable. I have no choice but to follow, although my knees are already weak. Watching a crime scene and experiencing a crime scene are two different things. “Be quiet and follow me,” orders the Hefti. “Does anyone have a flashlight?” Asks the head man, a little confused. It's dark in the apartment, from a distance I see the outline of Mr. Hefti, who suddenly stops at the end of the entrance and looks into the living room. He steps into the living room and we follow him. What is presented to us is a picture of horror ... Suddenly Gaillard cries out, a cat hisses past us out of the apartment between our legs. My heart comes to a standstill, only to start pounding again shortly afterwards. I'm not the youngest anymore. Frau Alder's large wall unit is on the floor, various objects smashed all over the floor. When the upper man finally finds the light switch, I see her and a young man whom she once introduced to me as her friend, sitting on the floor with pale eyes. After a surprised moment of silence, Luna Alder finally finds her voice. "Schnurrli had climbed onto the wall unit and couldn't come down ... Robin and I had always had an argument about my cat and he started yelling at her to come down, but that scared her even more. He climbed up the wall to get the Büsi down, and she fell over, ”she stutters. “The stupid thing,” adds the Robin. But not a crime scene, I guess.
André Birbaum

...
Hefti takes over the action - it wasn't for nothing that he used to be a bouncer. With his height and his black leather jacket, he made an impression from afar. He starts moving - with all his body mass - and ... rings. One hears from inside the apartment: Diiiiing - doooong. And at the same time the voices fall silent inside the apartment. Heavy footsteps can be heard, as if from heavy shoes. Everyone is hiding behind Hefti, who is building up wide in front of the door. The door opens with a swing - and Luna Alder says: Hello - what is it? Hefti was speechless - he couldn't get a word out. Alain Gaillard steps outside - he is also immaculately dressed this evening - and he shows the gentlemen of the good old school when he explains the situation to Luna Alder. The young Alder has to laugh a little, but then asks the whole troop into the apartment. She leads the way with her heavy designer shoes. Inside, Luna Alder's friend is sitting depressed on the sofa. Luna Alder explains that her boyfriend, Pedro, always goes to see the crime scene with her on Sunday evenings. Since he still has to work and can't go to the pizzeria until after 8 a.m., they always look at the crime scene together on the Internet a little later. But when they wanted to start with the crime scene beforehand, they realized that it wouldn't work. And today Pedro brought a lot of extra pizzas. That would be enough for six people. But the situation just ruined his appetite. Then Pedro's Portuguese temperament became apparent - and he briefly became a bit loud. Then Elias Odermatt steps in. The computer fan can be shown the devices and can find the fault in no time. When everything is running again, he says: I have no objection to a pizza. This Romarie Keller - also taking care of cleanliness here - brings plates and cutlery from the kitchen. And so it happens that on this Sunday evening a colorful group of people eats pizza together and watches the crime scene. The Odermatt with the dirty T-shirt, the cellars in their cleaning clothes, the impeccable Gaillard, the Hefti in the rocker clothes, and Pedro, the Portuguese - all at home with Luna Maria Alder.
Herbert Knecht

...
While the rest of us are still thinking about whether that will be enough, Hefti is already rudely banging on the Alder door and shouting: “Hey, Ms. Alder, are you all right? What's going on with you? "At first it gets very quiet, then it starts. The door is thrown open with a big bang, a dark figure with a jute sack runs past us to the outside. It's all going so fast. We look at each other. Hefti is the first to get hold of himself and calls out: “Hurry, Elias, we'll follow suit. You look after Ms. Alder and call the police. ”While Odermatt sprints outside to see the direction of the perpetrator, Hefti fetches the motorcycle key and off they go. And we? We are still a little perplexed in front of the open apartment door. Mr. Gaillard smiles encouragingly at me and pulls his cell phone out of his expensive corduroy pants. "Well, let's go." In Ms. Alder's apartment everything is already upside down in the hallway, in the living room the coffee table is overturned on the floor, the two chairs around it, Ms. Alder is lying in the middle in a pool of blood. But someone had dressed up and even set up chämpis. I'll take care of Mrs. Alder immediately, while Mr. Gaillard calls the ambulance. Mrs. Alder is completely dazed, the blood is leaking from a wound on the back of the head. She stutters incoherent stuff. The second call from Mr Gaillard is to the police. I only listen with half an ear "... yes, the perpetrator is driven by a blue motorcycle of the brand ...". Aha, Mr. Gaillard, you know pretty well who is doing what in the house and which vehicle is driving. This is a home lover. The ambulance is there very quickly. Ms. Alder is now being professionally cared for. After an initial assessment, the paramedic can give the all-clear. It was a slight concussion and a rind tear on the back of the head, very bloody, but still quite harmless. Ms. Alder is driven to the hospital for one night to sew the wound and for observation. An hour has already passed. Two policewomen inspected the crime scene and took photos. They agreed that we should now put something in order so that Ms. Alder can go back to a somewhat tidy apartment tomorrow. While I take care of the blood stains on the floor and carpet, Gaillard takes care of the overturned table and chairs. He actually does quite well at helping, despite the intervertebral disc. There is a rumble in the doorway outside: “We're back!”. We curiously open the apartment door. Hefti and Odermatt are standing outside with two police officers. Hefti and Odermatt are beaming: “The police were able to arrest the perpetrator thanks to our help. Imagine it was Wegmüller, our caretaker, this rascal. ”I can't believe my ears:“ Is that true? ”Thanks to the name tag, the policeman Müller smiles and says:“ Yes, that's true. Mr. Wegmüller obviously saw the valuables at Mrs. Alder during one of his home inspections. Then he made her pretty eyes and was invited to a romantic tête à tête for tonight and thought he could help himself straight away. Ms. Alder put up a little more resistance than expected. ”The second policeman, Remund, adds:“ He confesses. There was hardly anything else he could do, he still had the stolen valuables with him. ”Shortly afterwards, the two officers said goodbye with the request that we should all be at the orphanage police station tomorrow at 9 o'clock for the record. Hefti says: “Uff, what an evening, I'm completely exhausted. It's a shame that I missed the crime scene, but we now had the crime thriller in our own house. ”Odermatt replies:“ An idea occurs to me: I invite you all to come to me for the crime scene evening the day after tomorrow. With my TV subscription, I can look up today's crime scene for a whole week and I am happy to do that with all of you and Ms. Alder. I'll get the snacks. ”Gaillard adds:“ And I'll bring the wine that I bought last year on my vacation in Burgundy. After the crime scene, there will certainly still be enough time to talk about our cleaning plan in the house and to divide it up among us more fairly. Mr. Wegmüller will no longer speak to us. ”They say goodbye and go back to their apartments. I lock Mrs. Alder's apartment and pick up the squeegee again. Actually, our residents are okay, everyone in his own way. But with Mr. Wegmüller, the manager, I was not mistaken. And now I only see the crime scene, the first one in a long time.
Vera Friedli