What does society expect from boys

DJI Impulse: Mr. Scheithauer, what are the greatest risks for young people?

Herbert Scheithauer: It is a myth that everything gets mixed up in adolescence and that it is therefore basically a phase of life that is associated with increased risks. It is certainly a phase of upheaval. But it does not have to be accompanied by so many changes that the young people are automatically confronted with developmental threats.

What does a "normal" development look like?

This includes a healthy self and external assessment, the successful mastery of developmental tasks and the absence of psychopathology, i.e. mental disorders, and risk behavior. Young people should develop an identity, break away from their parents' home and at the same time build up a professional perspective.

Which girls and boys are more at risk in this phase?

Parents are very important. Young people take a lot from their family with them and later look for orientation. When they grow up in a warm and understanding family, they remember it positively. This can be decisive for action in later phases of life. Parents need to be very careful about their children's needs, even as the children change. Children have the right to go their own way. Parents shouldn't put their expectations of young people up to speed and assume that they want that too. A classic example is the lawyer who expects his son to become a lawyer as well.

Adolescence is also a time of trial and error in which adolescents make a lot of mistakes. Parents have to be very understanding and signal to their child that they have a secure hold with them. Conflicts between parents and young people often arise not because young people are changing and have new demands, but because parents cannot cope well with young people's changes. Especially during puberty something happens that children experience as ambivalence: They want to break away from their parents, but in certain situations they like to come back to them.