One can get self-actualization
Self-Empowerment: Do Your Thing!
Self-realization is considered to be the peak in the development of one's own personality. But how do you achieve this goal? Do you expect possible pitfalls and is there some kind of map that shows you the way?
This article is about exactly these questions.
Self-realization as your emotional fingerprint
Often the term self-realization is equated with realizing one's own dreams, wishes, goals or needs. From my point of view, however, this definition falls short and mostly relates to the situation of the person in the here and now.
Between your birth and the present, many beautiful and less beautiful events shaped your life.
The innocent, cosmopolitan and open-hearted being at birth may have meanwhile become an adult focused on material wealth and security.
So does it make sense to start at the end?
Let's take a closer look at this.
Let's assume that your childhood was not always rosy and that you learned that you are only worth something when you achieve a lot. Or you have adopted the belief of your parents: "You don't have to do what you want, but what makes you successful and ensures your prosperity."
To what extent could such imprints shape your mindset and thus your needs today? Yes exactly - a lot! Therefore, the focus on the needs in the current life situation can lead to a dead end.
Self-realization as a way to a vocation
If you want to prevent self-realization from being based solely on filling the emotional holes from childhood, you should direct your gaze to the question of your life's purpose.
I am deeply convinced that everyone should live their true calling (Grigor Nussbaumer)
You experience inner abundance and satisfaction when you follow your heart and thus your destiny. Determination, however, does not necessarily have to do with what you are good at or what talents you have.
The true calling has much more to do with your soul. This may sound esoteric, but it is something that many people feel this way today.
My definition of self-actualization is about doing what you are “meant” for. You can call it “life's work” or simply “your heart's desire”. The following questions will help you to get to know and live your essence:
- What is inside me?
- What am I passionate about?
- What is really important to me?
- What can I not stop talking about?
- Where does my heart jump and laugh?
- What do I want to give to the world?
These questions go in depth and can be quite challenging to your mind. If you feel resistance while reading, this is a good sign that you can take a closer look.
Self-realization is not an ego trip, but leaving your emotional fingerprint
So self-actualization is about more, much more! It's about your life and what you want to leave behind - your legacy. For you, this may be more of a philosophical question.
My experience from many years of coaching shows:
On your deathbed you will not care whether you have made millions, but whether you lived happily and were able to realize yourself as a whole being. But above all, whether you could love and were loved.
As an entrepreneur, I can develop my full potential
The start of my life was not easy and it was largely shaped by the early loss of my father when I was 6 years old. At the same time it was my salvation, because I was able to develop freely and finally found my purpose.
In my professional career, I quickly realized that I was versatile and creative. But which job could cover all of this? How could I realize all of my ideas without someone constantly telling me: “That doesn't work” or “Nobody wants that”.
So in 2002, at the age of 30, I started my own business. To this day, I haven't regretted a single day, because as an entrepreneur I can shape my life every day in the way that corresponds to my innermost being.
→ You can find more about me and my story here
The Self-Realization Trap
From my point of view, there is a path to self-realization, that of abundance and one that is sustained by lack. You can recognize the second by the following statements:
- I need this win to be satisfied
- I need a lot of money to be happy
- I need a partner to be fulfilled
- I need a luxury vacation so I can relax
- I need nice clothes to feel attractive
- I need recognition to make me feel valuable
Whenever you hear the phrase “I need” or use it yourself, you can usually assume that it is a need for deficiency
When it comes to basic needs like eating, drinking or sleeping, the phrase “I need” makes perfect sense. But when it comes to higher needs, this can lead to a cycle of dependency from which very few can break free.
Therefore, many believe that when you have achieved or got this or that, you have realized yourself.
I call this the "Self-Realization Trap". Because if you run up the career ladder from a deficit, amass money, emulate sporting goals or marry someone, you will not realize yourself. This person is only trying to fill an inner, emotional void.
Thus, self-actualization is not about the following questions:
- What do you expect from me?
- How do I have to be to be loved?
- Where can i be successful?
- What do my customers want from me?
- How do I get this or that?
- Where do I make the most money?
- Who do I get the most recognition from?
However, this does not mean that you can no longer treat yourself to anything or that you can only realize yourself if you ascetically renounce everything material. However, if you are looking for real fulfillment, you will quickly realize that self-actualization is not a goal but a path.
Self-realization as an entrepreneur
If you ask a self-employed person why they chose the entrepreneurial path, most of them answer: Because I can realize myself this way.
But is this the reality?
I was allowed to accompany various clients, from new founders to very experienced entrepreneurs with several thousand employees. One of my basic questions was:
Do you feel that your company supports you in living your calling?
Not infrequently I looked at perplexed faces.
Because for many entrepreneurs, over time, their own company is no longer the foundation for realizing themselves, but rather a prison from which they can no longer free themselves. Managers often feel trapped in the hamster wheel of their own success, entangled in many obligations and driven by fears of loss.
However, I see my company as the extended arm of my soul and thus as a mirror of my true self.
Since the founding, I have therefore made it a habit to review my work anew at the beginning of the year - not always to the delight of my employees. Because in the first few weeks of the year I questioned everything and introduced changes if necessary.
Practical tip: Question what you are doing at least once a year - radically. Does your heart laugh when you think about your job? Is your company giving you energy or is it sucking you out?
If the result is negative, change it. It is your life after all!
Do the potential check!
Would you like to further exploit your potential as an entrepreneur? Whether it is a difficult decision regarding business partners, challenging management tasks or goals that you want to achieve: Get support and learn it Shortcuts to Success know.
As an experienced entrepreneur and coach, I will accompany you to a free, self-determined and successful life!
→ My recommendation: The 361 ° potential check for entrepreneurs
Checklist for self-employed, entrepreneurs and managing directors
You may have a hard time figuring out whether your company is really an expression of your purpose. It is very easy to test this. Just ask the right questions and you will quickly find out if you are in the right place.
So I have a little one for you Checklist put together which one you for your annual position assessment to be able to use:
- Am I enthusiastic about my company?
- Do I start the day with joy, motivation and energy?
- Can I make my decisions independently and freely?
- Do I leave my company with a smile on most evenings?
- Can I freely steer the direction of my company?
- Do my clients value my work?
- Can I mostly show myself for who I really am?
- Am I healthy and fit?
- Do positive and self-motivated people surround me?
- Do I see a deeper meaning in what I am doing?
- Do I have enough free time for myself, my family and friends?
- Can I realize my true wishes with the income?
Practical tip: Don't just read the questions; write down the answers. It feels different and you may not even be able to answer one or the other question right now.
Above all, one thing is important: Be honest with yourself!
What is a good result? How many points do i need?
I can't give you a final answer to this question, after all, it's your life. But if you can say a resounding “yes” to nine or more questions with a clear conscience, that is a positive sign.
Coaching for Self-Realization?
You can use the checklist above to get a good position assessment. If you find that too many points have not been met, professional support makes perfect sense.
Instead of going around in circles, I advise you to contact me for coaching.
Non-binding inquiry for entrepreneurs
Fill in the fields below and send me a brief description of your topic. This is not binding for you.
The 5 best tips for self-actualization
If you want your life to change you need to be willing to invest too. Be it time, money, sweat or simply a lot of heart and soul. Therefore, the biggest obstacle that you have to overcome is your comfort zone.
Whoever does what he has always done will get what he has always got
One wish could be that you do not have to change anything in your behavior, but that you get a completely different result. Or that someone, e.g. a clairvoyant or healer, does something for you and then your life changes by 180 °.
The bad news: that will never happen.
The good news: it's in your own hands.
Here are a few tips on how to achieve self-realization:
1. Reflect on the path so far
Your self-actualization is directly related to your ability for self-reflection. So take your time to shed light on your path so far. You should think over long periods of time, even back to childhood. Because most of the patterns that prevent you from developing your potential come from the first phase of your life.
2. Learn to let go
You can only move forward if you learn to let go of the past. The more you carry along in your mental and emotional backpack, the more difficult it will be to achieve. Maybe it's about letting go of negative experiences or certain people.
I have already written a much-noticed post on this topic: Let go, but how? Learn to let go and be free in 5 steps (instructions, tips)
3. Change your mindset
The way you think and make decisions accordingly is a key factor in how you can achieve yourself. Often you stand in your own way and fears prevent you from doing your thing.
I have also written a detailed article on this topic, including 6-step instructions: Mindset - Success begins in the head!
4. Develop a vision
In the fourth step, you now strengthen the forward energy. You won't move forward unless you create a clear vision. This vision has to be big and very attractive, a picture of the optimal future that is irresistible and magnetic for you.
→ Link tip: Find and formulate your company vision in 12 steps (also suitable for personal vision)
I advise you to perhaps approach this together with an entrepreneur coach, because the vision is, so to speak, the guiding star that will guide you on your way.
5. Trust your intuition
While you are following your life vision, you should not let yourself be put off by resistance, critical voices or anything else. Your heart can guide you intuitively and serve as a step-by-step compass for self-realization.
You can read here how to learn to trust your intuition more: Targeted training of your intuition! (Tips, instructions)
How important is self-actualization?
There are people who are satisfied with themselves and their lives, regardless of the question of whether they realize themselves or not. Regardless of whether it's about the job, the relationship or anything else: it fits as it is.
And others, on the other hand, never seem to be completely satisfied, are always looking for the next challenge, the kick or are constantly asking themselves the question of the meaning in their life. They attend many events or devour one book after the other.
What is right or better now?
I have been asked several times whether it is even necessary to develop one's personality or to realize oneself. My answer was mostly:
When you are satisfied and fulfilled inside, continue doing the same thing
How important self-realization is for you depends on your inner feelings. Some are satisfied with very little, while others need more for this well-being. Needs play an important role in this. And this is what the next section is about.
Maslow's hierarchy of needs and Swiss cheese
When it comes to self-actualization, there is no way around Maslow's hierarchy of needs, better known as the hierarchy of needs.
Abraham Maslow (1908–1970) was an American psychologist who tried to describe people's needs and motivations in a simple way. He did this in a hierarchical structure, in the shape of a pyramid.
The bottom three levels of need can be referred to as the foundation. If these are not met, personal growth becomes much more demanding and that's why I define these as the essential needs.
Imagine a Swiss cheese: if the holes in the lower needs are not filled, the upper needs are more difficult to achieve
Ultimately, Maslow placed self-actualization as the highest need. If you yourself have ever experienced hunger, insomnia or great financial insecurity, you will quickly understand why self-realization is certainly not at the top of your priority list in such a situation.
Leadership impulse: If your employees feel comfortable, are financially correct, have the feeling that they belong and are even doing something meaningful, there will never be a lack of motivation. Before increasing the wage, you should always discuss whether there might be another need that would have to be met first in order for your employee to be more satisfied.
Surveys repeatedly show that employees are not more motivated when they simply receive more money.
Marketing and sales impulse: Ask yourself at which level your offer is mainly located. What needs or needs do your products or services cover for the customer? And how should your marketing or sales be adapted so that you can reach your customers even better?
You could possibly even save a lot of money if you knew the real needs of your customers and thus could use your budget in a more targeted manner.
New Work: Self-realization in the workplace?
This article is primarily about self-realization as a self-employed person and entrepreneur.
But many companies have employees who of course also want to develop themselves. Is this realistic? Can everyone realize themselves even if they are not the owner of the company?
A lot has changed in corporate culture in recent years. Of course, this does not apply to all companies, but most companies can no longer afford to squeeze their employees to the limit and then believe that they are still loyal even in times of crisis.
More and more companies are struggling with a shortage of skilled workers and have to think about how to retain existing employees and how to attract new, qualified employees.
With the old, mostly hierarchy and power-oriented management structures, this is becoming less and less successful. The classic career, which begins at the bottom of the ladder and ends as high as possible, has had its day.
A new understanding of life and work is needed
New Work (new work) is a concept that encounters the fundamental change in the world of work in which we are right in the middle:
- Location-independent work (home office)
- Desire for self-determination and participation
- Increasing digitization
- Time-independent work
- Need for meaning in work
- Fair wages (man, woman)
- Compatibility of family and work
There are now various principles by which companies can orient themselves. Here are a few examples, which you are welcome to modify for yourself:
- Freedom: Space and time so that employees can develop.
- Error culture: These are allowed to happen because we can learn from them.
- Development: Constant learning and further development as a basic attitude.
- Networking: Instead of departmental thinking, encourage cross-departmental exchange.
- ID: Stand behind the company and find the meaning in your own actions.
- Sustainability: Mindful management, also with a regional reference.
- Personal responsibility: Organize yourself and get more authority.
You can continue the list as you like and, together with your employees, define New Work for you and continuously develop it.
At the same time, the leadership must be able to mentally let go so that a new culture can emerge. In practice, this can be very challenging, especially when it comes to relinquishing power and privileges.
Self-realization in a team or an ego trip?
One criticism that one hears often is the one after the ego trip. People who realize themselves are only focused on themselves and become intolerant of others.
This point of view cannot be completely dismissed, because if you pay more attention to your needs, you could lose sight of the people around you.
Everyone's freedom begins where someone else's freedom ends. (Immanuel Kant)
In many conversations I found that it is often about jealousy. You do not allow the other to look more at himself, to no longer put his light under a bushel or to express his opinion more often. Because those who stand up for their needs show others that they should perhaps do this more and that is not always pleasant.
I am of the opinion that in a team, in a family or in a relationship, everyone has the right to self-realization. In the classic corporate structures, this is of course only possible up to a certain point.
Practical tip: If you yourself lead a team or work in one, bring up this topic once. Inquire about the extent to which the individual team members can realize themselves.
For a strong team, it is important not only to know the different talents and skills, but also to use them in a targeted manner. Perhaps team development also makes sense in order to further develop the potential.
Through the early death of my father and traumatic experiences in my childhood and youth, I discovered the spiritual world - this was my salvation! Because these experiences brought me to meditation and to mental and awareness training.
With books, authors' contributions, MP3 downloads, lectures, seminars and training, I and my employees accompany thousands of people full of passion and joy.
> Click here for the free Flow online course
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