How can young adults deal with urinary incontinence

Urge incontinence

One or more people shown here introduce themselves under a pseudonym at their own request.

Edda Klein (62) - a personal report

My name is Edda Klein, I am 62 years old, live in Wangerland and am retired.
In 2006 I had a mental breakdown and had to go to rehab. And urge incontinence appeared for the first time in rehab without my being able to classify what it was, of course. At first I just thought: This is the stress. After the rehab I went to the gynecologist about two months later. After a gynecological examination she referred me to a urologist and also to a neurologist. And after all the examinations were completed I got the clear diagnosis "sensory urge incontinence" in 2007.

First of all, the beginning was really catastrophic. I didn't mean that, I thought "no", my life is over. I can't get out, I have nowhere to go, I can't make dates and I have to be constantly afraid of getting wet. Terrible, it was really terrible. I always turned bright red when I said that
I was always terribly ashamed. But at some point I noticed: It's okay, it's okay, you don't want to make your life so dependent on it, so determined. And then I was also open to looking: What aids are there?

There are diapers or just pads and net pants. They were very important, especially when I was out and about. Then I started toilet training. That means: In the beginning I went to the toilet every hour and then always a little longer and longer breaks and now it is the case that I go to the toilet every four hours, so whether I have to or not does not matter - I go to Toilet, so reduce the risk a lot.

I ride my bike a lot and of course there aren't always toilets. Then there are funnels so that women can also pass water while standing. I have now paraphrased a bit. And yes, then that is a great help. If other people affected asked me "How do I talk to the doctor about it?", I would recommend: As openly as possible. So really say "Yes, I was just there, I don't know, in the worst case in the department store and got wet. That's mega embarrassing, no question at all. And you think like" I wasn't that ", something like that. But The most important thing is really openness, because this is the only way ultimately, that is, a clear diagnosis can be made, especially because there are different types of incontinence, which can then be treated differently.

For me it was also a process until I got there so that I can talk about it openly. This is a disease and it's not something that I chose
I'll say that now. And you talk about so many other diseases and then I brought it up, even if it really was me, so it was absolutely embarrassing. But it was right.

Christian (54) - personal experience report

I am Christian, 54 years old and a project manager. Well, I'm a guy who, when he's under tension, has always lost a little, uh, urine, urine. And then that became noticeable. So that was 2006 and I was diagnosed with urge incontinence. For me it was an overcoming. I have to say honestly. It's a challenge as a man to say that you have problems there. I always thought it was a sign of old age.

In the beginning there was shame. I really have to say. Because I thought it was an old man, old woman disease. And then I repurposed it. I said, "Man, it's not a disease, it's a disorder. I can only recommend it to everyone, if you really notice something in your body.

Research is good, but then you should find someone you trust who, where you have the feeling, could make a difference. It's difficult to even bring up the topic in the first place. So that you go to the doctor first, and you don't go offensively, into the story and say "Hey, I have this and that", but you ask as if in fact in the third person, "I know someone there" .. .

My doctor pointed out the most varied of options. I'm someone who questions a lot of things, that I'm not the type of guy who says "Ok, that's just what could help", but she introduced me to all the individual things that are there, whether with underpants in particular , with insoles, with medication, with hyaluron, even Botox appealed to her. Now it was my business to find out which form of therapy or which thing would help me. I wasn't sure about that yet and that's why I tried out a lot of things first.

Like a petrol station network, I first need a toilet network nearby. My company doesn't know about it. I don't want that either. They already know that I go to the toilet a lot. They always think I'm drinking too much or have a weak bladder. However, with presentations, you are totally excited, you have to make sure that you go to the toilet shortly before and that you take a short break. So I don't last for an hour but have to in between, I'll take the opportunity, and if it's a joke. I say "Yes, let's just take a smoking break" and then I use the smoking break to go to the toilet.

I do not understand our society that this is always interpreted as a weakness. So my disturbance is not visible. If I would make it public then it would be like "That's the weakness", then that's such a reduction in performance. I think I've now found a good arrangement that calms me down. Well, my wife knows that, I know how to deal with it and the people around you don't necessarily have to know that.

So I don't feel bad about it either. The disorder or such clinical pictures are not the end of the world. You have to practice using it, you can master it, you will master it and my motto in life is really: life is a challenge. Such a tiny, tiny malfunction doesn't somehow ruin life. So, you hardly lose quality of life. On the contrary, one becomes more aware of many things. And then pay more attention to his health. This is also a chance to understand things more profoundly.

Katrin Kallweit (43) - personal experience report

I'm Katrin Kallweit, 43 years old and I am an office communications clerk by profession, I work in a tax office. It all started in 2014 when I realized that I could no longer hold my urine, not at all, and I thought: "It can't be anything, it's not normal."

Stress incontinence was diagnosed, including urge incontinence. So I noticed that something was wrong, as early as 2014. It was the first time that I consciously noticed it because it was so bad that I was really completely wet. So that was a very, very terrible moment. But then it was like "Head in the sand and everything is not there." It just got worse and worse, of course. I had to go to the toilet three times an hour because I had the feeling that I had to be so urgent that if something should come up now, everything would go wrong.

It started in the morning. I actually always go out of the house with my daughter. And at the latest when we got to the door and I knew I had to drive 20 minutes to work. If something else comes up! I've said to her so often: "Go ahead, I have to go again." And then we always made fun of it, and then she said, "Three droplets again?" And in the end it was always just a little. But the feeling was incredible. Well, I really thought it wouldn't go well for long, it wouldn't go well for ten minutes. That was really crazy. And then that was no longer quality of life.

Whenever I was in a hurry and so on, I always knew: It would end with wet pants.
And that's how it always was. And that's what I always wanted. Incontinence is something very private, something very intimate too. That has to do with urine, too, it also has to do with smell. But I didn't want to tell anyone either. I already knew I had to tell someone. That's why I told my gynecologist, because she was a woman too. And when she said "I can't help you with that, a urologist has to clarify that", then I got off the whole thing again for a month.

Well, and then I went to the urologist. I then had to tell the registration what was going on, and that was all so uncomfortable for me. But then I was at the point where I said "I don't want to go on like this". I can only recommend to everyone to go to the doctor, to overcome oneself, to a certain extent, because it doesn't work, it doesn't get better, and at some point it has to be done. Unless you like to live like that and you accept it approvingly, then you shouldn't get angry about it.

In public I would wish that the topic is no longer so taboo. It's part of the body, it's human, and whether you're thirty, forty or eighty - I noticed that it's not a question of age. It can affect young people as well as older people. Therefore it is not said that it only affects 80 plus and that it is then a grandpa-and-grandma problem. Indeed it is not.