How can life be motivated to be alone

How being alone makes you strong


When there are only a few natural stimuli around you, it sharpens the senses. You perceive much more precisely. Your immediate surroundings and yourself. That is why adventurers are often so reflective personalities. Because they are often alone in nature.

Scientists use the effect of being alone even with stress patients

In the Restricted Environmental Stimulation Therapy external stimuli are specifically reduced, self-perception and awareness of one's own physical needs improve. However, memories or issues can arise that are uncomfortable. But it is the examination of them that ultimately leads to a real gain in knowledge.

People often suffer from a fear of being alone due to "cognitive bias"

You have a certain view of things and unconsciously constantly look for information, studies, opinions, events that confirm this view. And at the same time they feed their fear of being alone. But ignoring these supposed confirmers can help to see more clearly and to re-evaluate one's own view in order to overcome the fear of loneliness.

"Those who cannot find peace within themselves will look for it in vain elsewhere."

wrote the French author Francois de la Rochefoucauld. This is exactly the point: If the noise around us becomes low, we have to listen to what our inner voice asks - and give answers.

In order for being alone to be really valuable, some prerequisites must also be met

Kenneth Rubin, psychology professor at the American Carleton University, names the following:

  1. You have to choose of your own free will.
  2. We have to be able to enter into social relationships again at any time.
  3. We need to have a certain amount of control and reflection in order to be able to deal with emerging emotions.

If these prerequisites are not given, then being alone does not feel profitable for us, but inescapable. We feel lost in loneliness. By the way: Studies have shown that being alone is more uncomfortable for us, the more we believe that others judge our being alone negatively. In other words: In the cinema or at a party we feel much more lonely alone than in nature. Again and again nature. It's no coincidence that she makes us feel so good.


This article is an excerpt from my new book Your best self - inspiration for a powerful life. You can find out more about it and order it here