Why do you love your man

Answers to the question: What do you love about me?

What does she love about her boyfriend? Actually everything, says Susi, and that's an answer you often get when you ask individual parts of a couple what they love about the other. “That he / she is who he / she is” or “I love everything about him / her” are the most typical variants of this answer. Which of course is nonsense.

Nobody loves "everything" and the more unspecific the answer, the less they have dealt with their partner. As all-encompassing loving "everything" sounds, it is exactly the wrong word. The most loveless answer. Because there is little thought, little attention to detail, little care behind it. For example, the answer given by the protagonist in Emily Griffin's novel "Love the one you're with" is much nicer.

For example, she says that she loves that her husband Andy has difficulty remembering names or lyrics (“even with songs like Billie Jean!”). She loves his confidence and that he is so compassionate. "I love his sunny personality that goes with his blonde, blue-eyed boy-next-door look," she says. These are the specific things that make Andy such a lovable person for her. That delight their hearts.

Is that very vain?

Then she gives another reason - which I understand completely, but for which I ask myself whether it is a politically correct reason: “Andy loves me - and I'm not ashamed to say that it tops all the reasons why I love him back. ”This is reminiscent of all the women who whispered to their future husband in their vows of love on the VOX show“ Four Weddings and a Dream Trip ” that they love him "that you look at me as if I were the most precious thing in the world."

Is that very vain? Is it like being in love with yourself? Yes. On the other hand, with these sentences one simply expresses the warm feeling that arises when he or she pronounces the nickname so lovingly on the phone. The security you feel when your partner understands what you want to say without words. When he leaves a heart on the notepad, when his eyes light up because you walk into the room. Something like that is just beautiful. It's because of those moments that we're in relationships.

And that’s something you’ll be able to say.