Can be a newbie and a second date

Online Dating: Tips and Tricks : Flirt online - just how?

The idea persists that virtual flirting on the computer or via a dating app on the smartphone is much easier than real flirting. Online dating is easier for many than talking to someone in the nearest bar. Because you are not face to face with the potential conquest. Because nervousness and tension are not transmitted via the network. All of this is correct. And yet certain rules also apply to online dating, and so-called community administrators ensure that they are adhered to; they are formulated in the general terms and conditions of the respective pages. A few unwritten rules of the game for dating and online dating tips you won't find it there. Here are the most important ones:

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1. The nickname gives a first impression and should therefore be chosen carefully. The combination of first name and year of birth is widespread nowadays. However, it can be assumed that Bernd55 is in all likelihood older than he claims to be. According to non-representative surveys, at least five years, with figures from 60 more likely. A certain basic skepticism is therefore appropriate. Unless you are a geriatric nurse and consciously seek a challenge.

2. The profile is like a business card and important if it is to work with online dating: pose and beautiful painting are always included, and that's perfectly fine. It is only important to interpret relevant keywords quickly and correctly. Anyone who describes themselves as an “idiosyncratic lateral thinker” is probably more of a crazy muddlehead, the “romantic in need of love” may be a desperate woman with a relevant relationship biography.

3. Written flirting between two strangers has its advantages. There is no need to fear stutterers and you can fool a little without having to worry about red spots on your face. The situation is different with nuances and subtext, which are always present in real conversations. Tone and mood are difficult to interpret in the virtual chat, even irony rarely works in written form, and certainly not at all if you don't know your counterpart and his or her characteristics. Therefore: absolutely leave it, otherwise it won't work with online dating! In general, messages should be kept short. Nobody feels like reading epic emails from strangers. Sexist vocabulary should be avoided explicitly. The message could possibly be collected by the community administrator and your own access blocked.

4. The use of emoticons and relevant network acronyms should be done sparingly, otherwise one could easily be mistaken for infantile and uneloquent. One smiley and one lol per message are completely sufficient.

5. Pay attention to the time of sending the message! Anyone who wanders around on relevant pages in the morning could be considered an unemployed slack. A crazy freak with a sexual emergency may be behind the nocturnal chat orgies.

Can I cheat on my dating profile?

It is legitimate to spruce up your own biography, after all, it is important to emphasize advantages and disguise deficiencies. This is not cheating, it is logical, because this is how business works - especially !, when it comes to flirting and online dating. Not addressing character weaknesses in the profile straight away serves your own market value; Decorating certain phases of life can be booked under design tolerance. In case of doubt, the big, true sentence applies: "Don't hate the player, hate the game!" However, one should not exaggerate. Anyone pretending to be a rock star will have to justify themselves at some point when online dating becomes a reality.

And what should you watch out for with the profile picture?

Just as important as the profile is the profile picture for successful online dating. Even before a user deals with the personal details of a person, he decides on the basis of the optics whether this is even suitable for him. So if you think you can do without a photo, your chances of success drastically reduce - the famous pig in a poke is just not popular with people. It is therefore advisable to take a reasonably up-to-date picture, which by and large corresponds to the facts and is not predestined for the Photoshop Award. The use of third-party photos is strongly discouraged. Passing the face of a friend off as your own may initially have advantages, but at the latest on the first date you will find it difficult to explain. Absolute no-go: celebrity photos. Don't even think about using Angelina Jolie or Brad Pitt as a visual help! That is beneath your dignity.

What are the chances of success in online dating?

With catchy advertising slogans, the dating sites on the corresponding Internet offers suggest that nothing is easier than finding a partner. "Enjoy the summer - as a couple", attracts Parship and Elitepartner even proclaims: "Love is not a coincidence". Sounds like you just have to register quickly and nothing stands in the way of a happy future. It would be nice. But that's not realistic. According to estimates by the dating sites, the success rate when looking for a partner is between 30 and 40 percent.

The social psychologist Manfred Hassebrauck, who has been researching in this area for decades, also knows why. Pairing is always a compromise, said the scientist in an interview with Stiftung Warentest. But exactly the opposite is often given. Nothing less is promised than "the ideal partner" or a "long-term, happy relationship". If necessary also with reference to science. Some portals want to bring searchers together using so-called matching, and a Swiss provider even uses genetic analysis. You can believe all of that. Or maybe not. With the latter, at least the disappointment is less if it doesn't work out with love.

Contact exchange or dating agency: what's the difference?

Both are about bringing people closer to one another, bringing them together. Only the way this is done is different. Contact exchanges only provide the infrastructure for online dating. That means: The user has to search the databases for suitable profiles himself in order to find a successful partner. Registration on such sites is usually free at first; fees are only incurred when you take out a premium membership or take advantage of paid offers. This is where contact exchanges differ from dating platforms. These are chargeable from the start, their advantage is that members are made targeted offers. To do this, they first have to answer an extensive catalog of questions in which their own biographical information and preferences as well as the wishes of the potential partner are recorded. On this basis, recommendations are sent to the advertiser by email. So the partner search should be simplified. He then decides for himself whether he should follow the recommendations and get in touch with the suggested people.

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