How do mentally strong people deal with stress?

Mental Strength: 13 Signs You Are Stronger Than Average

Hand on heart: How do you deal with stress, problems and worries? Some seem to put away such crises with ease, emerge stronger from them and seem as if nothing could shake them. The second group struggles with problems, sees difficulties where there may not be any and takes everything to heart. What you lack is mental strength. But what is behind this splendid quality, which apparently not only allows you to better exploit your own performance potential, but also to bring mind, emotions and soul into harmony? An attempt to get on the mysterious track of mental strength ...

➠ Content: This is what awaits you

➠ Content: This is what awaits you

The secret of mental strength

It is not uncommon for us to decide in our head whether we are more on the winning or the losing side. Of course, none of us is immune from setbacks and defeats. But while some stay where they are or throw the gun in the grain, others get up, dust off their clothes and carry on - differently, better.

In psychological terminology, the term “self-efficacy” is often used in this context. What is meant by this is the confidence in one's own performance and the confidence to be able to overcome obstacles of all kinds.

However, this reminds at the same time of the mantras of positive psychology and the notorious You-can-do-anything-you-want-Chakka.

Of course, it's not that easy. Mental strength is not just a simple declaration of will with subsequent wish fulfillment. To achieve it, you need both: talent and training.

Definition: Mental strength - what is it anyway?

On the one hand, it is an enormously positively charged term, on the other hand, the collective term conceals numerous individual properties that only make up this inner spiritual power when they work together. For example, mentally strong people are characterized by the fact that they ...

  • be able to focus on your goal even in difficult situations.
  • See setbacks as lessons.
  • have a high tolerance for frustration.
  • Parry adversity with willpower.

In short, these people have a healthy mix of discipline, self-confidence and realistic optimism. Mental strength is therefore an essential key factor for personal success, but also to better master life itself.

13 signs you are mentally stronger than average

Now you may be wondering: Do I have this quality too? Maybe - after all, there are some indications that speak for it. And the more of these that apply to you, the more likely it is that you are mentally stronger than the population average ...

  1. You can judge strong emotions rationally.

    And not only hours later, but in the situation itself you are able to reflect on your feelings and evaluate them with your mind. This not only ensures emotional stability, but also impulse control.

  2. You know your fears.

    And meet them consciously. That doesn't mean you are less afraid, but this is less of a blocking force. This makes it easier for you to name triggers and make unfounded worries what they are: unfounded Just worry.

  3. They don't want to please everyone.

    There is a difference between treating one's fellow human beings with respect and kindness, or always trying to please others so as not to offend anywhere. Mental strength is also shown by being able to say no and, if necessary, deal with upsetting someone else.

  4. You can be alone sometimes.

    Those who are alone are automatically more concerned with their own feelings and thoughts. Mentally strong personalities have no problems with this, they do not depend on being entertained or distracted by others, but can also be happy with themselves. Or to put it another way: Without self-love, mental strength is impossible.

  5. You sharpen your talents.

    Instead of putting them on display. Because there is often uncertainty behind the latter. Some try to have others confirm their skills and actions. Mentally strong people, however, are confident of themselves and intrinsically motivated to constantly develop themselves further.

  6. You stand by your weaknesses.

    And don't try to hide them (which would be nonsense). Everyone has weaknesses, no reason to be ashamed of them. Mental strength, however, deals with it differently: Either by working openly on it - or by surrounding yourself with people who compensate for these weaknesses. This is what makes scientists healthy Self acceptance call.

  7. You live your values.

    And also feel comfortable with it. That means: you can easily make decisions that correspond to your values. Do not let yourself be unsettled and can also come to terms with the possible consequences. In other words, you are authentic.

  8. Your self-esteem is based on who you are.

    And not on what you have achieved or lost. This makes you less susceptible to self-doubt and saves you and your self-esteem from over-imagining what you have achieved and forgetting to help you.

  9. They practice gratitude.

    At first glance, some may wonder what gratitude has to do with mental strength. A lot! A grateful attitude not only makes you healthier and happier, it is also a key to more self-control and lets us forego short-term gratuities in favor of long-term goals. And that's a sign of mental strength.

  10. You learn from mistakes.

    The majority claims that for themselves. But just watch yourself how you deal with mishaps or defeats: Is your first impulse to look for excuses and explanations? Or are you trying to see opportunities in being more successful in the future?

  11. You take responsibility.

    For each of your own decisions. Quite a few people complain about their current unsatisfactory situation - because it is more convenient than doing something about it. People with mental strength, on the other hand, accept what cannot be changed or change what they do not want to accept. Both are a decision - and you take full responsibility for both. Just like for her life.

  12. You see yourself as part of the solution.

    And not as part of the problem. The point is closely related to the previous one. But it goes beyond that: Out of circumstances - no matter how adverse - mentally strong people do something. Or as the bon mot sums it up so nicely: Where there's a will, there's a way; Who does not want something, finds reasons.

  13. They are happy about the successes of others.

    Mentally weak people see life as a zero-sum game: If one wins, someone else has to lose - if in doubt, they themselves. Envy, bitterness and jealousy are their primary feelings when others are more successful than they are. Mental strength and greatness of character prove, however, who is happy for and with others (and can laugh at himself). Such a person is also internally free.

The more times you have agreed to the above points, the stronger you are mentally. If you could agree 8 times or more, you are already stronger than the average.

Here the whole thing again as a graphic in the overview


All those who recognized themselves less often in the above indications do not need to be angry anyway, because ...

Mental strength can be trained

Mental strength can come in handy in a variety of situations. She can help you not to lose your head, but to make the best of a difficult situation, both with professional problems and a private crisis. Unfortunately, not everyone is endowed with the same level of inner strength. Some people seem to have it in their cradle, others can hardly understand how others manage to keep calm. But mental strength can also be trained and consciously built up.

The 13 above indicators also provide good approaches to what you can do and train or do differently. In addition, numerous experts repeatedly recommend these three strategies:

  1. Stop negative thoughts.

    Interrupt the usual spiral of thoughts about what could happen or what fate is bad for you. You just pull them down - and don't change anything. So do not sink into self-pity and do not fall into the role of victim. It makes them small and weak. Better to accept failure and make something of it. For example, rephrase your thoughts in positive, constructive sentences. Instead of: "I never succeed in anything!" better: "Now I know how I can do it differently!"

  2. Make your own decisions

    The second step on the way to mental strength is to realize that you yourself know best what is good for you. You can seek advice or an assessment from others, but at the end of the day you need to make the decision that is right for you. In this way you can not only shape your life the way you imagine it, you also gain something even greater: inner freedom and independence.

  3. Accept change

    No matter how much you want constancy, things will always change. Mental strength helps you to accept these changes and respond to them accordingly. But it also works the other way round: If you manage to come to terms with the permanent changes in your environment, you train your mental strength and build it up. Over time, you will be steadfastly looking to the future without worrying about possible scenarios.

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[Photo credit: Karrierebibel.de]

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November 9, 2020Author: Jochen Mai

Jochen Mai is the founder and editor-in-chief of the career bible. The author of several books lectures at the TH Köln and is a sought-after keynote speaker, coach and consultant.

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