Korean men meet black women

Koreans are too successful for relationship

The Korean Kim Eun-Ji was on around 50 dates in her life, all of them followed the same pattern: Talking about hobbies, eating (man pays), drinking coffee (woman pays), then the man brings the woman home - or to the subway stop. She has seen them all: men who were an hour late, those who can't roll up spaghetti with a fork, and those who spent hours talking about their favorite computer game.

The 37-year-old Korean is still unmarried. In general, she says, it is never so popular when she says that she travels a lot for work and can look after herself financially. “I went out to dinner with a couple of Koreans a few days ago and I wore my Hermès scarf as always.” In South Korea, it's normal to dress well and dearly. But one of the men didn't stop asking Kim about it in front of everyone: "He kept telling me that I dress too luxuriously."

The protruding nail

Suddenly, when Kim Eun-Ji tells her Korean friends about it, it doesn't sound so impolite anymore. "In Korean, such sentences are not presumptuous," she says, "there it is normal to discuss private matters publicly." Anyone who lives in Korea will quickly hear: You are dressed too fat, too old, too dearly dressed. Koreans love Confucius and he once said: “If a nail pokes out, then a hammer aims at it.” Kim Eun-Ji is pretty, successful, but because she is unmarried, she is a huge nail by Korean standards that looks like you Hammer screams.

But it has become difficult for women in Korea and East Asia as a whole to fit into society because the demands on them are contradictory. On the one hand, they should be educated and independent, but at the same time in no way superior to the man. They should conform to strict ideals of beauty (slim, big eyes, high cheeks), but not make too much of their type. They should appear grown up and at the same time pull childlike grimaces on photos. They are supposed to know and travel about western films, but if they want to live by a western example they are considered traitors to tradition. Superwomen wanted.

The losers are the women

One of the consequences of these high expectations from society is that around a third of women over 30 are singles. In Korea in particular, the laws of the market have long since expanded to include relationships, as predicted in Michel Houellebecq's “Expansion of the Battle Zone”.

Only, as in the book, the losers are not the men, but the women. This is not necessarily obvious for visitors to Seoul from Europe when they stroll through Gangnam at the weekend, this richest district in Korea, which became world famous through the hit of the singer Psy. Everywhere you see supposed lovers making double selfies arm in arm.