Why are speeches so important

Couple biology or why talking is so important in a relationship

Why would you want to listen to other couples when they talk about their problems and crises? Isn't that always the moment when one hears so embarrassingly away from befriended couples?

May be true. But sometimes it's not so bad to overhear other couples discussing problems. And then you’re even happy that they’re turning it into a podcast.

We are of course not talking about Lieschen Müller and her husband, but rather about couple diology, the podcast by Charlotte Roche and her husband Martin Keß-Roche, in which both ask each other questions. Sometimes it's about the ups and downs of their relationship, sometimes about what they appreciate about each other or what they find difficult - and always at eye level and with a lot of love, openness and respect.

Open communication between couples: Between courage and hara-kiri

And because Charlotte Roche and her husband do it so disarmingly well, some things become clear when you listen. On the one hand: How important it is in a partnership to speak openly. And you can't credit couples with that highly enough. Because that requires a good portion of A *** in the pants.

Yes, you think to yourself as you listen, it should always be like that. If everyone spoke so openly, there would certainly be fewer misunderstandings, fewer lies and fewer breakups.

But can every couple manage that like the two of them? Because as much fun listening to this podcast is, how entertaining the two are, it shows one thing very clearly: Of course, talking is vital for a relationship. Hardly anyone does it in this blatant form like the two of them.

We actually know very well that anything else is pointless. So a lack of openness. Lack of communication among lovers. At least if I want to have a lasting relationship on an equal footing. But who really implements this theoretical knowledge one-to-one?

Are you ready for your couple dialogue?

You touch yourself by the nose and think: Have I ever communicated so relentlessly openly in my relationship? And what questions would I ask my partner that I never dared ask? And would I be ready to hear the answers? And vice versa: Would I answer all of his questions and when would I pull the joker and refuse to answer?

If you realize this or maybe even write down questions, you can find out very well for yourself how much closeness and openness you can endure yourself and in which areas you are not ready to open up. And that's maybe not that few, if you’re honest.

It is surely great to say: "There is only you for me. I have no eyes for anyone else." That shows a lot of love. But doesn't it also show a lot of love and trust to tell your partner when and in what form you were or are receptive to external stimuli, i.e. other people?

Asking each other: Have you ever fallen in love with someone while we were together? Did you envision what it would be like to have a completely different life with someone else? Do you find other people exciting and attractive?

And whoever thinks this type of questioning and communication is extremely dangerous, has perhaps already given himself an answer as to how things stand with the relationship. Love also needs the courage to be open. This does not have to apply to all areas without exception. Surely everyone has their limits. And not every couple has to think that this is great, but it is a thoroughly admirable way of loving.

And something else becomes clear when you listen to the two of them: Regardless of whether you are a successful presenter and book author or a meat specialist from Oberhausen: in the end, everyone has the same issues and problems in their relationship. And they can be solved - if you communicate with each other.

There is inspiration for your couple diology here

Anyone who has now become interested in this open type of communication (or eavesdropping on couples) can be helped. Even without a podcast.

Because if all of this always went too fast with the podcast and if you prefer to sit down with a book in hand, which you can leaf back through and read in peace, you can also consume the whole thing as a book.

The book is not a 1: 1 podcast, but the topics have been arranged and reworked. In this case, this means: the couples therapist Ursula Nuber comments and provides further information.

Perhaps the reason for one or the other couple to think about questions and to engage in such an open dialogue. It would definitely be a start for more communication. And let's be honest: That would do a lot of relationships very well.

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What on the ears:Click here for the 'Paardiologie' podcast on Spotify.

What to read: Couple biology. The relationship book, Charlotte Roche and Martin Keß-Roche, Piper Verlag / April 2020 -> buy now here on Amazon * or directly fromPiper Publishing House or order from your trusted bookseller.

* Affiliate link