Have you ever felt empty and lost?
Lost yourself: this is how you find your way back to yourself
Do you know the feeling of having lost yourself?
Everything feels kind of numb and empty. You don't feel anything in you and everything seems pointless to you. Because you have no drive and no energy at all, you have to force yourself to do everything. Everything is numb and foggy. Dead, that's what it feels like.
Even with things that were previously fun, everything remains empty inside.
That is really not a nice feeling and at the same time scares you.
Because in such times we somehow feel disoriented and above all we are afraid of not finding our way back to ourselves and our vitality.
How we lose ourselves
Most of the time it is not even clear to us how we got into this uncomfortable emotional situation. Where our vitality and joie de vivre have remained.
Of course, it could have happened through an event that threw us off track:
- The death of a loved one
- The end of a relationship
- A traumatic experience
But very often we creep into this state. Until at some point we notice that something is wrong and we are only functioning.
Then we start to doubt ourselves and everything we do. "What's wrong? What am I doing wrong? ”Everything is questioned and we put ourselves down.
And certainly not everything is bad and wrong. We just somehow really lost ourselves or a part of us. Just like our feeling says: We have lost a part of ourselves that belongs to a happy life for us - we do not pursue a deep need.
Very often this happens when we just let our minds guide us. Then we take everything else important, just not ourselves. We push our needs and desires away and pay no attention to them. Yes, they are even annoying to us, because other things are much more important. Often we do not notice at all or much too late that we are moving away from ourselves.
Most of the time, this is also due to the fact that we don't have a precise awareness of who we are. What makes us What are our essential wants and needs?
Instead, we build a picture of what we think we should be. We are of course very strongly influenced by our childhood. But even today, our environment, advertising, films, the Internet, etc. do everything to give us an idea of what our perfect self should look like.
And then we let ourselves be pushed into a form or even do it ourselves. We do not even register that it does not correspond to us at all, nor how it takes our air and freedom of movement away.
We may notice that we are not really comfortable, but we suppress that. With discipline, rigor and pressure it has to work somehow to correspond to this picture. Because that's how it has to be, that's how we have to be, and that's the only thing that matters. We are only allowed to show and live what corresponds to this image. That's why we cut off more and more of ourselves.
It shouldn't be like that
More and more of us get lost and we suppress the real us. Then we do not show how we really are and do not live according to our inclinations and needs.
At some point we become more and more resigned, because that's not how we imagined life to be. So it is far too exhausting and joyless.
I would like to give you a small example from my practice:
A while ago a teacher came to me who had been struggling with depression for a long time. When I worked with her, it became apparent that she was usually serious and serious. She believed this was important for students, parents, etc. to have respect for her. By nature, however, she was a totally funny person. But she always suppressed her funny way. Self oppressed.
After our collaboration, she no longer found her very own, funny manner disturbing, but finally lived it out again. She got better very quickly. She now has more joy in life and more joy in teaching. Since she is now making it more relaxed and with more humor, it is much easier for her and her "new" way is very well received by the students.
This is a good example of how our beliefs often force ourselves into behavior that is not at all good for us.
Very often it is also an inner need that we do not meet, such as
- more silence
- more lightness
- Desire to travel
- Desire for variety
How to find yourself again
When you live according to your nature and needs, everything is much easier and more alive. Then your energy flows and you have joy in life.
In everyday life, with all its demands and external influences, it is not so easy that you do not stray too far from yourself.
What can you do if it did happen? How do you find your way back to yourself?
1) First come to rest
It is always easier to get clarity for you when you are in a calm environment and are also calm inside. There is probably a total mess in your head and a lot is pushing you down. Therefore, let go of all disturbing thoughts and feelings first. You can use my audio to support this. In this I will accompany you and help you to calm down and to come to yourself. You can listen to it or download it here.
2) Accept yourself and the situation
Don't put yourself down because things don't seem to be going perfectly right now. My accompaniment via audio will also help you with this. If you have realized that you have lost yourself somewhere, this offers you a great opportunity. Because now you can find out what you are missing in the truest sense of the word and how you can get it back. So try the situation, try to accept yourself in order to find your way out of the crisis and emerge stronger from it.
2) Find the cause
Just take the time to find out what has removed you from yourself and what you have lost.
The following questions should help you
- What are your goals and, above all, how? Are you feeling light and happy or too dogged?
- Are the demands you place on yourself appropriate? Are you putting too much pressure on yourself?
- Do you have enough time to do things that you like to do or is everything just a duty for you?
- Do you care enough about your own needs?
- Are there enough moments in your life that you can really enjoy?
- Do you give yourself as you really are or do you constantly pretend?
- Do you have a longing in you that you cannot fulfill?
- Do you feel overwhelmed or under-challenged?
4) Find a solution
When you have recognized what does not suit you and what is missing, you are already a big step further. Now try to find a solution. Do you have to change something in your life or is it “just” your attitudes that have driven you into the situation?
Probably it is both, because your attitudes lead you to act against yourself. So check your thought patterns and get rid of old ideas that are not good for you. I know it's not exactly easy, but here I've described how you can do it.
Also consider concrete steps how you can adapt your life more to you and your needs.
How you feel more and more alive
Find out more and more who you really are.
- What do you belong to?
- What do you need so that you are completely happy and feel good?
- What speaks against it at the moment?
If this is difficult for you, then get support. A neutral view from the outside is always good, because we often wear huge blinders across from us 🙂
In addition, it is quite normal if you are repeatedly tormented by fears and self-doubts or other internal hurdles arise on your way to you. You can also be helped very well with this.
In any case, don't let yourself be dissuaded from bringing back everything that has been lost to you.
The more you are connected to yourself and live yourself, the more joy you will feel. Then you really feel alive from the inside out.
I wish you a lot of courage and strength, but also joy in discovering yourself and living more and more freely.
Make your life beautiful
PS: Regardless of how you feel, I know exactly that you can find yourself more and more and more joy in life.
- Are corn flakes good to eat for dinner?
- France would benefit from fewer civil servants
- Can ladies sing Medha Suktam
- What problems only INFPs understand
- Are eggs a vegetarian food 1
- What is participation
- What is the Ram Nandan Committee
- Are Taiwanese and Japanese the same thing
- How can I produce creative ideas
- Is polygamy abnormal
- What is Patiala famous for?
- Why did you start playing video games
- What are the best data wrangling tricks
- What are Scottish landowners called
- Do you feel that the teachers are underpaid?
- What does a counseling service do
- Why is Saudi Arabia so misogynist
- When was the first phone invented?
- What is a title 1 teacher
- Where can I meet a rich man
- The government of Tamil Nadu will ban TASMAC
- What is your rating of ESCP Europe
- How can we solve the overpopulation in India
- What was Adam's punishment