How do I motivate old people
Motivation for old age - How do I properly deal with old people?
I can remember when I used to be slowed down in the supermarket because obstacles to slowing down were again distributed in the aisles as I reached retirement age. At first glance, they just stood around and had nothing to do. I, on the other hand, was in a hurry, I thought I was important, I worked for his pension and they just stand around and prevent me. That was my thoughts then and now I feel ashamed of it in retrospect. I thought I was the most important thing in the world, forgot the most important thing. These slowers in the corridors are the people I should have the utmost respect for. They experienced the war, built up the country and brought generations into the world without which my generation would not exist. They carry so much life experience that it is difficult to run fast.
With this contribution I would like to do something good for these people. And will you help me? If you pay attention to a few small things in dealing with the life experience carriers, you will make their retirement much more pleasant and do good, good that you also wish them later. If you don't start with that, you will end up as a disregarded stopper later. First of all, I would like to write that the following tips are based on my personal experience and not 1: 1 applicable to all old people. They are too different for that in their diversity of aging. The following 7 principles
- Show them that they are normal and accepted
- Help them, but not completely
- Give them a task
- Make old age normal
- Don't tell them what they're doing wrong
- The next spring will be the most beautiful
- Use the time when it is there
apply to all people, but I still think that they are many times more valuable in dealing with the old generation. Here we go
Show them that they are normal
So easy and yet so difficult for some fellow citizens. You want to be treated and accepted normally in all situations, don't you? Nobody wants to be an outsider, but old people are quickly turned into that. Especially when someone replies: "They don't have to work anymore, they have a lot of time.", I find this statement to be disrespectful. Each of us has a life and it doesn't matter where the person is in life. He should always be accepted and, above all, treated normally.
As normal as possible. Of course, you have to speak louder from time to time because your ears are no longer the best. It can also happen that you have to explain some things more often until they are understood. Talk to them, be interested in them, help them, take time for them ... treat her normally. Do not look away! Try to understand their fears. There are people who find it difficult to deal with disabled people and this is exactly how it is for some people with “the elderly”. At that point, keep reminding yourself that they are normal. Even if they hobble, have difficulty hearing or have to wear a diaper.
Help them, but not completely
An old person doesn't want everything to be done for him. To take care of him so that he just sits in the TV chair and lets himself be showered, that makes him sick. Every day he is confronted with his limits, things that he can no longer manage. If you then take care of things that he could and still want to create, then you take away a piece of his life. Just as you are satisfied at the end of the day when you have achieved something, the old person needs it. To decide whether to help or not is a responsible decision. Too much help makes him feel useless and also as a burden, too little, however, shows the limits very strongly and demotivates.
My grandmother is 90 years old and is therefore of an age that is worthy of care, but still lives in the house and does what she can. Eating Cooking is now more difficult for her because all the dishes from the past (roast, goulash, ...) are becoming too complex for her. She manages to cook potatoes with her left hand, even if they burn 1-2 times a month. And so I help her cook food. I take care of the more complicated part and Grandma makes the potatoes. As a result, she can always proudly tell her small pensioner clique and relatives:"I make lunch myself.". She is very proud of that and she doesn't feel that "old"like someone who would like to make his own food, but is not "allowed" to do it and is always served it. I think it's important to always involve the golden generation as long as they can and want to.
Give them a task
Being needed is an important elementary feeling in each and every one of us. At least that's how I feel. I am always overjoyed when I can do good with what I do and what I know, and when I can help others. What is good for me will also enrich other people. In my opinion, it is essential that everyone has these tasks. This includes coping with light work as well as the opportunity to meet your own requirements.
A few years after retirement can wear down “NotMoreUsed”. A person can become an object that just stands around until it is disposed of. I know it sounds tough, but it does “Being used” is part of the fire of life. Especially when an old person in the village has already survived many of his generation, is lonely, then the last thing he can do with is aimlessness.
I'll go back to my situation. The fact that I open the gate every day when I come home from work makes grandma happy and makes her feel needed. I think the neighbors often think: “Is that a lazy grandson. He always lets an almost 90 year old woman open the door. ”. But there is more sense behind it than many think. I am also happy every time I have a hole in my sock. Not that I have enough other pairs, or that I couldn't buy a new one, no, I give it to grandma and ask if she can plug the hole. Like in old times. She loves this task, especially on long dark winter days. Then I am proud to be presented with the result and the joy of being needed. Of course, I put these socks on, even if colleagues or friends smile a little about it. This plugged hole is pure medicine.
By the way, it is generally an exciting topic to deal with older people. The more you understand the "old people", the better you get along with your normal environment. Here are three books that will definitely take you further on both levels.
Make age normal
Old people sometimes see old age as a bad thing, a kind of disease. I can understand and understand this well. In the high years there are some things that can no longer be implemented. On the one hand, it is harder to see, and on the other hand you can no longer ride a bike. Many things that used to be commonplace and simple become memories and desires that can no longer be fulfilled. That wears down, and in the same breath old people see many younger people for whom everything is still possible.
Some people can handle it well, some need your help with it. It's not about buying a tricycle and letting you ride it. It is your job to gently teach them that it is normal to be like this at this dignified age. You don't have to be able to do everything anymore and nobody demands this. I always feel like I'm being pressured into thinking that the world out there is expecting certain things.
"It is normal that at that age you can no longer look as well as a young person." Is a typical sentence, a simple example of age confirmation. Better still than to say what you can no longer do is list what is still possible. My grandma is already very limited in various areas. Slower, more forgetful, more fearful ... but I always tell her what she can still do, things that are not taken for granted at her age. Whenever she is sadder and says:“I forget more and more and can no longer do this or that. ", then I answer all the things that can still be:"You can take care of yourself, you can still read and write and although you can no longer ride a bike, you can still walk without any problems or with a walker.". If you tell an old person what he can still do and that you are happy about it, that you are impressed, then this is a very good motivation. After all, there are enough other people of that age who are not doing so well.
Don't tell them too often what they're doing wrong
After a certain age, active people make more mistakes. And the biggest thing you can do is keep pointing out these mistakes and trying to correct them. If you keep saying what was done wrong, it demotivates this generation. They are afraid of not doing something right, and by telling them everything that is going wrong, you feed those fears.
Rather say what you can do (a little) better next time, instead of coming up with the mistake. And when they find out for themselves that something has been done wrong, tell them it isn't that bad. In most cases it is. “That's not that bad.” Or “It's all OK.” Are good words to dispel fear. And whoever makes mistakes in this world, at least does something, right?
The next spring will be the most beautiful
All people, especially the elderly, need an "event" that they still want to experience. When life comes to an end, this "event" is often missing, and it is worthwhile to look joyfully into the future. A piece of the will to live is missing. Many goals in life have already been ticked off (Man, woman, child, house, traveling, ...) and then it is more difficult to see a goal, an event. Just imagine you have lived your life and everything that is still to come, or what you can do, has already been (v) experienced. Where is the goal? And I use a trick here. I have been saying for years, especially on the short days in the cold winter days:“I heard next spring will be the most beautiful spring in many years. I still had to see it. ". I understand that this sounds a little unusual. Nevertheless, it releases undreamt-of strength when the old person suddenly has the goal to experience this most beautiful spring. When you are then told: “I still want to make it through winter. I want to see this most beautiful spring. ", then you have awakened the fire of life. Someone who (still) wants to live does not live any shorter than someone who has no more events ahead of them. Of course it doesn't have to be spring, but it is a good choice because it is always beautiful, it can also be another destination. It is important, however, that you help the elderly to find such events, to see them and to look forward to them.
Give them time
Old people in your relatives, such as grandmas or great-grandparents, should enjoy as much time with you as possible. Because they don't have that much of it anymore. In my opinion, it is more important to spend more time than to spend long periods of time in a row. For example, if you live close to your old family, you should be seen regularly, every day or at least once a week. Take care and don't "skip" it because of a stressful week. And even if you live further away, call them regularly and as often as you can. Many people spend hours every day typing and sending fun pictures via WhatsApp and Co, forgetting the people who can no longer even use WhatsApp. Of which to “invest” in a call every day Simply having 5 minutes of small talk with a dear old person is one of the best heartfelt gifts. Just as people are looking forward to next spring, so is your great grandpa looking forward to your regular call or your time.
As you can see, these tips go a lot in the direction of “motivating old people”. A motivated person is capable of much more. I am convinced that good motivation can create years of life. It is particularly important for people who are fit for their age. Here you can easily do good. I'll convert one of the most famous quotes from Steve Jobs * to something.
“If you treat someone you dear old every day as if it were the last day, then you will eventually prove to be right. And especially in old age you will get justice faster than you would like. "
I hope this article has given you some helpful thoughts. Perhaps you also have one or the other experience and would like to share it? Then leave them in the comment. Incidentally, some time ago I accompanied my grandma until she fell asleep very calmly and forever. If you want to find out how it was for me and how dying "works", then read the article: How does dying work? The last hours before death - my experiences by.
Thank you for reading and I wish you a lot of heart when dealing with old people
About the author:
Over 700,000 visitors have visited this blog in the last 4 years and accompanied me on my way to personal and financial freedom. Despite a simple employment relationship, I manage to get myself a regular monthly (passive) Additional income between 1,000 and 2,000 euros to build up. Clever INVEST, excited TO BLOGand always a look in the direction PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT... these are my tools and at the same time the topics on this blog. Find out here how I went from being a simple farmer to an investor and send me a messageif you want to get in touch with me.
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